


A Day for Tears

by Philomytha



Category: Vorkosigan Saga - Lois McMaster Bujold
Genre: Missing Scene
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-08-08
Updated: 2011-08-08
Packaged: 2017-10-22 09:30:45
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,353
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/236602
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Philomytha/pseuds/Philomytha
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Illyan takes the news from Jackson's Whole to Aral at the end of <em>Mirror Dance</em>.</p>
            </blockquote>





	A Day for Tears

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [Five Conversations in Alys' Office](https://archiveofourown.org/works/30229) by [Philomytha](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Philomytha/pseuds/Philomytha). 



> Follows immediately from a scene in 'Five Conversations in Alys' Office'

Illyan sat in the rear of his groundcar and forced himself not to tap his foot on the floor. The journey to ImpMil seemed to be taking forever, though objectively, the elapsed time was about average for the drive from the Residence. But so many times over the past weeks, he hadn't believed he would be able to deliver this news, then hadn't believed he would be able to deliver it to Aral. Illyan was used to expecting the worst and being glad to discover himself wrong, but this time his deliverance seemed entirely miraculous.

At last they arrived, and Illyan made his way up through the building, not needing the polite hospital porter who was theoretically showing him up to the Prime Minister's room and who wound up trailing a pace behind Illyan's rapid stride. He could tell when they arrived by the increased number of guards who, well-trained, stopped and challenged him without a hint of apology in their eyes. Illyan nodded approval.

"The Countess asked me to come," he told them, and there was a brief pause while they conferred, then Cordelia emerged.

"Simon, good," she said. "They're just waking him up now. Come on in."

Illyan held the door politely for Cordelia to precede him, then entered, tensing as he did so. He'd seen every medical report, every scrap of paperwork this medical calamity had generated, but he hadn't spoken to Aral for weeks.

The room smelt of disinfectant and other medical chemicals, and was full of equipment and monitors watched by discreet medtechs. In the centre was the hospital bed. Illyan's step faltered as he saw Aral. He seemed shrunken, grey, old. His eyes were closed. Illyan made himself keep walking behind Cordelia, a coil of pain starting in his stomach and snaking up through his body.

Cordelia didn't seem to notice either Aral's appearance or Illyan's hesitation. She perched casually on the side of the hospital bed and put her hand alongside Aral's cheek.

"You awake there, love?" she said, sounding almost normal to Illyan. There was just the slightest hint of stress in the timbre of her voice; someone who didn't have hundreds of thousands of chip-recordings to compare it to probably wouldn't have noticed. She looked up and made an impatient gesture for Illyan to come close too, and he did, circling around to Aral's other side. Aral's eyelids flickered, then opened, and Illyan snapped automatically to attention.

Aral looked at Cordelia, not seeming to perceive Illyan. He made a slight sound, and Cordelia stroked his face and smiled.

"They've done the transplant. It all went well. You're on the mend now, my love."

Aral attempted to speak, cleared his throat weakly and said, "I don't feel... any different."

"You will. Trust me." She bent over him then, both hands caressing his face and kissing his forehead, and Illyan looked away, feeling more like a voyeur than usual. Then Cordelia said, "And Simon's here. He has some news for you."

Aral's head turned slowly towards Illyan, and Illyan had to force himself not to salute. Aral clearly couldn't return it, and that would dismay them both. Instead Illyan said, "Yes, my lord. I have a new report from Jackson's Whole. Good news."

No understanding flickered in Aral's eyes, and the coil of pain in Illyan's stomach tightened. "Jackson's Whole?" Aral echoed faintly. He blinked up at Illyan, squinting, and Illyan realised he'd instinctively stood with the light at his back. Aral made a tiny movement with his hand. Illyan's body obeyed it without any conscious thought on his part, and a moment later he was kneeling beside the bed, eye to eye with Aral, his hand resting over Aral's. Aral gave the slightest of nods. "That's better," he breathed. "Go on."

"Lord Mark's trip to find Miles," Illyan prompted, and saw the beginnings of memory starting in Aral's face, in the way his lips tightened and his eyes narrowed. "Good news," he repeated. "He found Miles. Alive and well. They've just boarded the ImpSec fast courier to take them home. They should be here in fourteen days. They're coming home, Aral. They're fine."

Watching Aral's face change, Illyan felt overwound tension and misery of the past weeks start to uncoil at last. Aral's hand turned under his and closed, and his smile grew slowly wider. Illyan felt his eyes prickle, and blinked rapidly. Aral looked at Cordelia. "Did you hear that, dear Captain?" he whispered. "They're fine."

"Yes," Cordelia murmured, "I know."

"Good work, Simon," Aral added, looking back at him.

"I didn't do anything," Illyan admitted. "Lord Mark did it all. I, ah, understand that he has left a... familiar pattern behind, on Jackson's Whole. In the process of locating and rescuing Miles, he killed Ryoval and took over House Ryoval and then sold it to Baron Fell, except for a, um, research institute that he purchased for himself." And Illyan had no idea at all what that was all about, but that was an experience he was used to having when reading a Vorkosigan report.

Aral gave a hoarse gasp, then another, but before Illyan could grow truly alarmed he realised Aral was laughing.

"Both of them ... at it now," he said when he could speak. "You're never going to have a moment's peace again, Simon."

"Neither will the rest of the galaxy," Illyan retorted, and Aral wheezed another laugh, and for a moment he looked himself again. Illyan began to laugh too.

"Now I feel better," Aral whispered. Cordelia leaned in and kissed him very lightly on the lips, then rested her head on the pillow beside Aral's, and Illyan saw that she looked both relieved and shattered. Aral tilted his head against hers, but did not release Illyan.

"Thank you," he whispered, eyes half-closed.

Illyan remained there until Aral's eyes drifted shut and his grip went slack. Then Cordelia sat up carefully and nodded to Illyan, and he drew back his hand and got to his feet. He went around to Cordelia and offered her his arm. She leaned on him.

"I didn't know joy could be so exhausting," she murmured as they left Aral to sleep. "Take me home, Simon. He'll be out for hours now."

Illyan walked with her down to the exit and into the waiting groundcar, feeling as tired as Cordelia looked. There was still an endless list of things he had to do, but he thought he could face it with equanimity now.

"I'm sorry I had to keep you away until now," Cordelia said, sitting down in the rear compartment. Illyan took the opposite seat. "You can visit whenever you want from now on, that's fine. It's just ... you always make reports to him, and he expects you to, and he couldn't have handled it before."

Replaying the conversation with Aral, Illyan supposed she was right. They conversed about other things, thousands upon thousands--his chip began to count, and he stopped it firmly--but it always began as a report.

"I can understand that," he said. "I was very glad to see him again, though."

"He did miss you. But... he was so weak, I couldn't risk..."

"I know." He leaned back against the cushioned seat and stared out the window for a moment, then said, "I'm sorry for doubting Lord Mark." Their arguments from the past months whirled through his memory, all the sharp things Cordelia had said to him, the equally sharp things he'd said to her.

Cordelia gave a small smile. "It was your job to doubt him. It's all right." She looked at him, her eyes meeting his. "I need you to doubt people for me, you know. That's why I can trust. Because I know you're there to step in if it goes wrong."

"Oh," he said faintly. Damn, was she trying to make him break down again? He swallowed.

"You were a complete prick about it," she added, her smile widening, "but that's all right. We love you anyway."

It was a day for tears, Illyan decided. There was no helping it. But they were tears of happiness.


End file.
